Magic Pig Bladders

So, scientists have discovered that if they scrape the stuff off the inside of a pig's bladder, dry it into powder and sprinkle it over wounds that people can regenerate lost body parts. They're calling this stuff pixie dust, but I think it might be more appropriate for them to call it "piggie dust," give credit where credit is due...

Junk Mail

So, I have set up another blog which I originally intended to use for testing templates that I might want to use here, but I haven't found anything that I like as much as this little pink flower template. I'm going to keep the extra blog and use it for all the memes and surveys and general junk that I like to do, but don't like to post here. I'm calling it a flawed beauty...junk mail. If you need something to do, check it out.

Team Player

I'm not having a good day today. I feel very agitated and bothered about some stuff that I'm not going to post about here. However, always one to do her part, Maybe made me smile by posing so nicely for this picture:

She loves having her picture taken, and I always have a hard time taking pictures of her in which she's doing anything besides smiling into the camera. Also, please forgive the parade of poor quality photos. My real camera has a dead battery and I can't seem to find it and the charger at the same time, so I've been using the camera-phone.


I don't really watch American Idol, but I do Tivo it and turn it on for background noise while I clean or blog or read...whatever. I don't like complete silence. So, I just looked up, and the prettiest boy I've ever seen is on TV. I don't mean sexy, I don't mean handsome or attractive. I mean pretty. Prettier than a girl. Prettier than anybody really has the right to be. Ladies and gentlemen, I present Jason Castro:

Doggie Jail

Justin sent this picture to my phone this afternoon. I love it because Marlowe is cowering in the corner (in spite of the fact that this crate is his "safe place"), but Maybe totally looks like a gang leader or something. She's clearly been hardened by life on the mean streets of Backyard.


Most of the time I don't like living in a small town. Everyone knows my dad, so I have to watch what I say (or buy...) in the drugstore, there's no take out Chinese (which is practically medieval) and nothing is open after 9pm. (Except, naturally, the Super Wal-Mart. Ew.) However, occasionally something so fantastically small-town-Texas comes along that makes it totally worth it that my first grade teacher knows exactly what kind of birth control I use.

Tradio is one of those things. It works basically like newspaper want-ads, except that it's on the radio, and instead of just paying for advertising by the dj, people get to call in and say what they've got (or what they want) in their own words. It's the most entertaining thing ever, and I really wish I could put some little recorded clip from the show on here, but I can't, so you're going to have to bear with me while I try to insert the appropriate rural Texas accents here.

"yee-ahh...Ah have a 1999 (nahn ten nahtee nahyn) Ford pick up truck fer sayle. Lookin' fer 8000 (eyght thousayund) or yer best offer on thayt. Y'all can call me at uh...806-555-1212."

Ok, so that's your typical call in ad. The real beauty of Tradio comes though, when someone is both selling something and wanting to buy something. Mostly because the things never seem to relate to each other in any way. It's too hard to type the accent, so on this one, do it yourself, just add one or two extra syllables to every word.

"Hi, I have six bales of hay for sale, I'd like a thousand dollars on those and I'm looking for an aquarium."

Or this one, which makes more sense:

"I have a wedding dress for sale, it's never been worn. It's a size six and strapless with a cathedral train. Also, I'd like to buy myself a crib and a stroller."


Thank You Dorothy Parker

Inscription for the Ceiling of a Bedroom

Daily dawns another day;
I must up to make my way.
Though I dress and drink and eat,
Move my fingers and my feet,
Learn a little here and there,

Weep and laugh and sweat and swear,

Hear a song or watch a stage,

Leave some words upon a page,

Claim a foe or hail a friend--

Bed awaits me at the end.

Though I go in pride and strength,
I'll come back to bed at length.
Though I walk in blinded woe,
Back to bed I'm bound to go.
High my heart or bowed my head,
All my days but lead to bed.
Up, and out and on;
and then
Ever back to bed again.
Summer, Winter Spring and Fall-

I'm a fool to rise at all!

Sweet dreams everybody...Or have a nice day, whichever direction you're going...

More Concerned Than I Should Be

This was posted on Found! a few years ago, but I just saw it today. Looking at it, I sort of think that maybe it was intended to be a Post Secret sort of thing, but what it really inspires in me is the urge to scream "take this pill every day because you love yourself, not for some loser named Brody!" The next thought is "oh god, I hope that the week's worth of pills that she obviously didn't take were the placebos..."

PS: It's been more than a year since Justin posted anything on his blog, but he says he's going to start posting again and he's got a shiny new template so go look at it!


Two posts in one day? Aren't you the lucky ones? Justin and I had planned to go to Amarillo today for his dad's birthday, but things fell through, and in spite of our best efforts, we are still at home. We did, however, make the best of things by filling up a bowl with water balloons and playing catch with them, and then just throwing them at each other... and then at the end, Justin threw one at himself. It was super fun, (not to mention incredibly cheap entertainment) and I think Justin is feeling better about our canceled plans.

It's fun to play catch games with Justin because, no matter what the object being "caught" is Justin behaves as if it's a live grenade. He covers his face and dodges it with his body, and catches it out beside him as if he's afraid that at any moment it could explode. It's true that with the water balloons, this might be a concern, but he behaves the same way with the Nerf football, which, as far as I can tell, is quite sturdy. He also makes noises, which I can't quite describe here, but sound somewhat like the sound I make when I slip in the shower...

[Editors Note: I just read Justin this post and he said "you made me sound like a weenie! I'm a big boy and I can catch a football!!" I find the fact that in defending his manliness he refers to himself as a "big boy" to be the most hilarious thing ever. I would also like to add that yesterday, at a restaurant, he dropped a roll on the floor and then ate it. I think that's more than enough machismo to make up for the water balloon flinching.]

Unfortunate, But True

The blogger for The Economist says:

"I’ve realized that covering Mrs Clinton's campaign without explicitly stating that it has turned into a win-at-all-costs operation fueled by phony outrage, hypocritical proclamations and absurd notions of who is electable and who is not is an exercise in deliberate deception, and I can't do that.

Perhaps it is because Mrs Clinton is the underdog that the tone of her campaign is so different from Mr Obama’s....Most of the time she simply looks like a caricature of the voters she’s trying to lure. And when it comes down to policy, there are simply not enough big differences between the two candidates to allow her to catch up. So she must make Mr Obama look unelectable. She must go negative. And she has.

This is no longer a campaign based on ideas. It is a campaign focused on tearing down Mr Obama. We all know that’s her only shot at the nomination. I’m tired of pretending otherwise."

At the beginning of this campaign I was a supporter of Senator Clinton, I was even okay when she started to display, openly, her win at all costs attitude. I generally believe that someone who wants something more than anything and no matter what, tends to take it more seriously when the goal is attained. I want our next President to have really wanted to win. I don't even mind the nastiness, that's just politics. Hillary lost my vote when she got whiny about it. When she started saying that the Obama camp's tactics were unfair and more importantly when she said that the vote's don't really matter and that we should leave it all up to super delegates. I hate that sort of fit throwing, and I don't like the recent attempts to morph into a member of whatever group she's speaking to at the moment. This sort of behavior just makes me want to scream "remember who you are woman!" I understand her desperation, but I don't like it.

Sleeping Dogs Lie

A rare moment when Maybe is actually tolerant of Marlowe sleeping close to her. You can tell that she's suppressing the urge to scream from the indignity of it.

Killing Time

Stole this from Megan I realize that I do too many of these, but really, I could be doing something so much worse.

Do you have any pets?

2 dogs inside and 2 cats outside, but I don't think the cats claim us anymore.
What color shirt are you wearing?
Name three things that are physically close to you:
1. Diet Pepsi
2. Newspaper
3. Camera
What is the last book you read?
Naked, by David Sedaris
What's your favorite sport?
I like to watch hockey, I like to play catch, does that count as a sport?
Do you enjoy sleeping late?
I like the sleeping part, but I don't like losing a lot of the day.
What's the weather like right now?
Lovely, spring.
Who tells the best jokes?
Both of my parents are pretty funny, but that's not the same as joke telling is it? I don't really like the kind of jokes that get "told."
What was the last thing you dreamt about?
Nightmare about Lilith coming out of the hot water heater closet.
Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?
I just recently started driving again after a couple of years of being chauffeured. I seem to crash more than I should.
Do you believe in karma?
Do you believe in luck?
Do you believe in magic?
Yes, yes, yes!! I believe in all the silly things!
Do you like your eggs scrambled or sunny side up?
Scrambled with ketchup.
Do you collect anything? If so, what?
Postcards and pretty glass bottles.
Are you proud of yourself?
Hardly ever.
Are you reliable?
Is this a job interview? If so, yes.
Have you ever given money to a bum?
Yes, and once, daffodils. Do we have to use the word bum?
What's your favorite food?
Currently Cheez-its, but I always love chicken and dumplings.
Have you ever had a secret admirer?
One time, when I was in Jr. High someone left a teddy bear and a mylar balloon on my front porch on Valentine's Day. For awhile, I clung to hope that it was from a boy, who would some day reveal himself, but now I'm pretty sure it was from my dad. Weirdly, that makes me like it more.
Do you like to draw?
No, but I like to watercolor.
What's your favorite invention?
If I say nail polish, will I be ridiculed for being too interested in being pretty? Better avoid that and say something useful...birth control.
Is your room messy?
Not right now.
What do you like better: oranges or apples?
Apples, on sandwiches, but really, I love mangoes and berries.
Do you give in easily?
Nope, I tend to be more like a strangler fig, holding on until someone chops my tree out from under me.
Can you read other people's expressions?
Always. They don't always like it.
Are you a bully?
No, unfortunately, I'm a nice girl.
What time did you wake up this morning?
I woke up at 10:30 last night, and then again at 8:45 this morning. I'm really tired of this night schedule.
What did you eat for breakfast this morning?
Chocolate donut. Super healthy, I know.
When was the last time you showered?
I'm about to do that now, by the time anyone reads this it'll be over, so I'll say today.
What do you plan on doing tomorrow?
I don't know, it's kind of up in the air right now. I need to return a dress that I accidentally bought 2 of.
Do you have any nicknames?
Justin calls me Bumblebee, my dad and mom both call me Susalu occasionally.
Have you ever been scuba diving?
That is something I would so not enjoy.
What's your least favorite color?
I don't like anything neon.
Would you ever go skydiving?
I don't know. I've been very interested in experiencing that falling sensation without actually hitting the ground. I think I'd rather fall into one of those gigantic pillows than have a parachute, though.
What toothpaste do you use?
Colgate Whitening for sensitive teeth.
Do you enjoy challenges?
I'd really rather things just be easy, if possible.
What's the worst injury you have had?
I've been hurt worse, but the thing that still bothers me most is a chipped front tooth. I know, unforgivable vanity.
What's the last movie you saw?
I don' t know, it's been too long since I watched a movie. I'm going to watch All About Eve over the weekend. We'll go with that.
What do you want to know about the future?
I don't think it's good to know too much, so I'll be happy with the information I already have.
What does your last text message say?
Inbox: Probably be fine.
Outbox: (Waaay too dirty to post here, sorry.)
Who was the last person you spoke over the phone to?
Dad, why is that always the answer to this question?
Would you rather have money or love?
Love. As long as there's money for the basics, and the occasional treat, I don't really mind being broke.
What is your dream vacation?
What is your favorite animal?
Donkey...or maybe llama. I really like pack animals. Weird.
Do you miss anyone right now?
Do you need to do laundry?
I think I'm pretty much caught up.
Do you listen to the radio?
Sometimes NPR in the morning.
Where were you when 9/11 happened?
I was on my way to a job interview. When I got back to the car and turned on the radio, I thought it must be some sort of trick, like with War of the Worlds.
What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
I have a huge fit and then I go get Justin to shake out my Twizzlers.
Have you ever caught a butterfly?
They don't generally like to be captured. Sometimes one will land on me, and that's nice.
What color are your bed sheets?
White with blue and green stripes.
What's your ringtone?
It just rings like a phone, and thank goodness for that. I hate all those horrible musical ringers.
Who was the last person to make you laugh?
Do you have any obsessions right now?
Let's not talk about this.
Do you like things that glow in the dark?
No, things that glow always startle me when I wake up and can't figure out what the hell that is in the corner (or wherever).
What's your favorite fruity scent?
Do you watch cartoons?
Never. Well...I guess I occasionally see a Charlie Brown special or a Disney movie, but it's not like it happens all that frequently.
Have you ever sat on a roof?
A long time ago...I liked it.
Have you ever been to a different country?
Name three things in the world you dislike:
The whole world? Only three? Ok, I'll do my best.
1. Socks
2. Death Penalty
3. People who lie to children.
Name three people in the world you dislike:
Well that's a risky little game isn't it?
Has a rumor even been spread about you?
Well, I did go to high school...
Do you like sushi?
Oh god yes, and it's been ages since I had any! I hate living in this wasteland.
Do you hold grudges?
No, but I seem to get mad at the same people over and over again for the same things. Stop pissing me off people!


Over the weekend, I sat around and blew my nose, dosed it up on Nyquil and Dayquil and watched excessive TV. I did manage to do a couple loads of laundry and wash the dishes, but let's face it, that's bare minimum.

Justin, in the meantime worked on stuff for his jewelry class, re-caulked the bathroom and vacuumed the entire house. He also bought me a fabulous pair of sunglasses, taught Marlowe to sit and made a huge deal out of my haircut, even though it's hardly a trim. I totally won the husband lottery.

PS: That messy coffee table? Not my house anymore. The picture was taken while we were moving so give me a break! :)

Self Esteem Boost

I love it when I get new toiletries. Even when it's just every day stuff, shampoo, shave cream, and moisturizers I just want to throw myself into the shower and try it all out. Especially if it's in pretty bottles. My new shampoo, formulated for long hair, comes in a bright red bottle and is called "Long Term Relationship." Yes, I'm a complete sucker for marketing. I cannot wait to wash my hair tomorrow.

There's also this: for the first time in my life, I'm wearing the right colors of makeup. You'd think that since I've been wearing makeup for about 15 years that I'd have figured it out a long time ago, but alas, this just isn't true. At some point, someone (I can't remember who) told me that I had a "cool" skin tone and should choose makeups with a slightly blue undertone. Since then, I've been buying rose colored blush, plum eye shadows and all the wrong shades of red lipstick. All of these things worked together (with my super pale skin) to produce the look of a wide-eyed, over done porcelain doll (especially in pictures). If I ever managed to put on a full face of makeup, or even just blush and lipstick, I looked somehow overdone.

But that's all behind me now because I have discovered the magical world of peach and apricot makeup. I no longer look like a 6 year old pageant queen when I apply my blush. I look like me, only less washed out. My lips no longer scream "misguided adult film star." Instead, they quietly whisper "don't you want to kiss me?" And thanks to my new mastery of an eyelash curler I will never again have to drive all over town with raccoon eyes. (I touch my face too much for mascara to ever be my friend.) I feel like such a girl, a pretty girl, and it's just so refreshing. I'm a little disturbed that no one ever told me that I was doing this whole makeup thing wrong, and that no one ever showed me how to do it right, but more than that I'm bothered that it took me so long to figure out exactly where I was going wrong. I mean really, should there be a 15 year learning curve on lipstick? Where was the Mary Kay lady when I needed her?

Ah well, better late than never...


It's cold and rainy today, and while I normally like that, today it's not what I need. I've been longing for weeks to be somewhere tropical and sandy. I want sunshine and palm trees and water that's warm enough to walk into. However, I guess I'll settle for a tanning bed and this video.

Walk of Shame

While we were at work last night, Maybe tore through the house destroying things. The contents of my bathroom trash can were spread all over the floors not only in the bathroom, but in the bedroom (she just cannot resist the lure of toilet paper that's had a nose blown into it), she managed to destroy one of our mouse traps (the kind that look like a little box), it was in about 17 pieces on the living room floor (peanut butter, irresistible!), there were two yogurt containers licked clean on the sofa, and she dumped Justin's trash can out in his bathroom.

Justin is now taking her on the walk of shame, in which he takes her from room to room points at her transgressions, and and says "bad dog" in the most guilt inducing manner that he can. She follows along, her tail tucked between her legs, pretending to be sorry, but from the look on her face, I can tell that she's really thinking "Snot, yogurt and peanut butter? So totally worth it."

PS: This is my 400th blog post!I feel like there should be cake or something...


Justin's dad is sick. Last night his sister, Ashlie, called us and said that he'd had a heart attack, and fallen down, and hit his head. Several hours later at the hospital it's been determined that he did not, in fact, have a heart attack, but that his blood pressure had dropped rapidly (which has been happening fairly regularly, unfortunately) and that caused him to pass out. He has a (I think) minor concussion, and was complaining of shortness of breath and pain in his chest. After an x-ray to rule out broken ribs from the fall and a CT scan to check for pulmonary embolism it turns out that he's got an infection that was preventing one of his lungs from working properly. Anyway, all the stuff that's wrong is better than an actual heart attack, I'm not sure if he left the hospital last night or not, (I would assume not though) and we are waiting on the next update from Ashlie, for now, I think I've got all the facts right and I'll let you know more as and when...thanks for your thoughts.

Marlowe Update

It's warm outside, but cold in the house. I blame Justin, the Thermostat Nazi. I seriously think it's set on something around a "comfortable" 45 degrees. As proof of this insanity, I present Exhibit 1, Marlowe burrowed as far as he can possibly get into the electric blanket that I'm forced to cover my legs with in order to avoid frostbite.

Forgive the poor picture quality, I had to take the shot with my phone because getting up to get the real camera would leave me exposed and Marlowe disgruntled. Since I haven't posted a picture of this adorable creature since the first day we got him, I'll post one now, not taken with the phone, and one that does not involved him hiding his sweet (sleepy) face.

See, we're friends, pay no attention to the fact that he runs from the room when I call his name. That only happens because he thinks that "Marlowe" means the same thing as "no." We're considering a name change, (he doesn't know his name, so I don't think the change will be traumatic for him), but I can't think of anything that I like better.

I guess that's it for now. Justin is at my aunt's house working on a project for his speech class, so I'm all alone here with the dogs, both sleeping. I want to stay up at least until Justin gets home but right now, I'm very sleepy. (Notice the circles under my eyes in that picture...) G'night.

Life Before Death

This is a series of portraits taken of people in the weeks before, and immediately following their deaths. Not everyone will be comfortable looking at them, but I have always been comfortable with death, and I think they're really touching. I find that they give me some peace about the losses in my life this year.