So, Justin has had this terrible ingrown toenail for over a year and I was finally able to convince him that it had to come out or that he'd end up losing his toe, his foot or even his leg eventually. His appointment was today and it went like this:

It was rather more traumatic than we expected. First off it cost a lot more than it should have considering that our insurance is supposed to be paying for a chunk of it, and the fact that it's really a 20 minute procedure. Then there was the anesthesia. The needle was this long: --------------------------------------------- I'm not kidding at all, and he put it in the top of J's toe just above his toenail and then he moved it up and down and in and out like he was digging for something and some of the time it went ALL THE WAY IN!! Then he sucked up some more of the drug and did the same thing in the side of his toe, and I totally thought that it was going to go all the way through. I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to watch the actual surgery because just the shot was so scary. But of course I couldn't pass it up, so we headed into surgery and waited for more than an hour.

Justin started feeling like his anesthesia was wearing off and he got really scared so when the doctor finally came in he checked it and Justin said "yes I can feel that, it's sharp," which is NOT what he's supposed to be able to tell. So the crazy doctor said "well it's mostly numb, I'm going to GO AHEAD AND TRY IT. If it hurts tell me." So they started and it was SOOO cool, ( you know I LOVE watching that sort of thing). So Justin starts gripping the chair and looking like he's about to cry, but I think "oh, he can just feel the pressure and it's freaking him out," because you know, surely if he was in pain he'd be screaming like a maniac and make them give him another shot right? So I watch him cut the toenail in half and remove it one half at a time and then inject some sort of chemical to kill the root and keep the nail from growing back.

Anyway, he got it finished and wrapped and then after they left Justin said "It wasn't numb, I felt it. It felt like he was yanking and twisting to get the toenail off, " which is of course exactly what he was doing. Turns out Justin was supposed to get 3 shots, not 2. The doctor missed a whole side of his toe!! I cannot believe that he didn't say anything! I guess it makes sense though, because he said that those scary shots were the worst part, so maybe it's better to have someone yank off your toenail instead of digging around in your toe with a giant needle.

He's sleeping now all wrapped up and with only 9 toenails, and a bandage that looks like he broke his whole foot instead of just having a toenail removed (he's a bit of a bleeder). I gave him one of those scary pain pills so that at least he would sleep and not hurt all night. They don't seem to freak him out as much as they do me...

I took "before" pictures, and when we can take the "after" pictures on Saturday night I will post them. You will be amazed at how terrible his toe looked before (and probably after, I'm just guessing but it can't be pretty), however I am quite sure that this was the best thing to do. He was in a lot of pain all the time, and now he'll be in a super lot of pain, but just for a little while and then he'll feel better forever (or at least until another toenail goes all rabid).


So, while the weather hasn't been even remotely fall-like, the trees apparently got the memo that "it's time" a bit too early and leaves are dropping like...well like leaves. This isn't something I would normally post about, or something I would probably even notice except that:

A) We are the only house on the block without a tree in the yard.

Which is why this doesn't make any sense:

B) We are the only house on the block that has a lawn full of leaves.


Even if they are for something that I would never in a thousand years buy.

Even if the product goes completely against my fundamental beliefs.

Even if it is poorly made and the actors are ugly.

I am completely addicted to infomercials.

I've spent the last 20 minutes totally mesmerized by the ad for the new TaeBo videos. Anyone who knows me knows that A) I hate to sweat, which is what all those people are doing and B) I am not even coordinated enough to make it from my front door to my car 100 percent of the time, much less jump around swinging a 3 pound stick, but I just can't pull myself away.

Perhaps it's time for bed.


I've been away because I am reading every entry in this blog for the past 6 years. I think it's funny, and it gives me something to do besides watching plastic surgery on tv. I may be gone for awhile.

Editors Note: Thanks Patrick for telling me the link didn't work. I think I've fixed it, if anyone is interested. ~S

Further Proof

That A) Maybe survived her ordeal with the allergy monster
and B) As we suspected, we are raising not a beagle type animal, but a goblin.

Drama Queen

Maybe has been getting in trouble a lot for stealing stuff out of the assorted trash cans and eating panties, so today in total retribution for our rude behavior, she punished us, by scaring us to death. We got home from work and she went outside as usual, Justin tucked me into bed for a nap (before my real bed time, I've been splitting my sleep into 4 ish hour increments) and then he left and let her out again. About 20 minutes after I fell asleep I heard him shouting for me, sounding really scared, so I ran into the office and he was sitting on the floor with Maybe, who looked a little puffy....

He rolled her over and she had huge hives all over the skin that wasn't covered in hair, her eyes were red and watery she was totally lethargic, except for frequent head shakes (because of itchy ears) and as I said, she was puffed up like a marshmallow. Allergies. We do not know to what, but we assume that while she was outside that something bit her or that she ate something she shouldn't have. (That being her standard MO.) I gave her 25 mg of benadryl and called the vet who told me that that was the right thing and to wait for half an hour for it to work, and if she wasn't better to bring her in. So we sat around staring at her for awhile and when it looked like she wasn't puffy anymore I brought her to bed with me to monitor her breathing. When I woke up this afternoon she was much better. Just a little groggy from the benadryl, but I'm totally ok with a groggy dog.

So, that's the news this morning.


After living in a house for nearly 2 years without a shower (which does not mean that I didn't take showers, note the difference), I am proud to be able to post this picture:
How's that for fresh faced?

Nothing Interesting

Same old boring stuff. I wish we could find a place in Lubbock with better than decent, remotely affordable sushi. Justin starts back to school in a little over a week. I think he's excited about it. This is his last semester of filler (ie, algebra, speech) before he can move on to the radiology program, but because they only take applications for the program at the end of the spring semester, he's going to have to take one more semester of filler before then anyway. I guess that's all. I really have nothing to say, but it's been awhile so....there ya go.


"I must not shift, alter or hide myself in order to experience love -- because that's not really love -- that's when resentment is born."
Sabrina Ward Harrison

So, I recently read the autobiography of a fat girl, (like myself) who "overcame" her compulsive eating (which I don't have) and lost a bunch of weight and lived happily ever after. Ok that's fine the story was interesting, but the thing is, throughout the book she feels bad about herself. She believes that she has no value because of her size. She believes that no one will ever love her or value her just because she's fat. She never dates, she assumes that people don't want to be around her because of the way she looks, even though she has nice features, a pretty face, an incredible job...

So, now, I'm watching Cold Case on TNT. The team is investigating the death of a fat girl who signed up for a dating service in the 80's and subsequently turned up dead. When they find her tape in the apartment of a guy, recently deceased, they assume that either a) he has guilt about killing her 20 years ago, or b) he has some kind of "fetish." That he couldn't possibly be interested in her, or be attracted to her in any way, because she's a "specific kind of girl."

Ok, I'm this specific kind of girl. I don't have the feelings that the girl in the book had about herself. I don't think I'm worthless because of my weight. I know that I'm a pretty girl. I've never had any trouble finding someone to date. I never assumed that anyone was with me because they had some sort of "fat fetish." Yeah, I'd like to lose some weight, mostly because I want to have a healthy pregnancy in the next 5 years or so, but I don't think being skinny would change my life.

The thing is, I keep seeing this theme repeat, in tv, the movies, books: No one really wants a fat girl. It's shameful to be overweight. If you're fat, you should at least pretend to be on a diet in front of people. Always order a salad if you're out with people. I'm starting to wonder if I should feel these things. I mean, should I be ashamed of who I am? Should I stop letting people take my picture? By believing that I'm attractive, am I somehow delusional? I feel like by feeling relatively good about myself, most of the time, that I'm doing something wrong. So now I'm feeling kind of conflicted about what I'm supposed to think and feel about me. I dunno, it's just been on my mind lately.

Do I

Put off "get the hell away from me and leave me alone" vibes? It's been mentioned. I certainly don't intend to, but it might explain why I haven't had a friend within 100 miles of me in a couple of years...


Taken from Terroni

Are you taller than your mother?
Umm I think so, but I look shorter because I'm fatter.

What color is your car?
We have two. Mine is happy-blue, and broken right now. Justin's is red.

If you instantly become qualified for any profession, what would you do?
A lawyer. Defending the wrongfully accused and perhaps working with the ACLU. If only law school was free and didn't require a PE credit.

What is your ring-tone?
It just rings. I find that the songs get very old very fast particularly if you hear them in your head and dive for the phone even when it's not ringing.

Is there an animal that creeps you out?
Ew ticks. fleas. mosquitoes. Any bloodsucker really.

The last person you rode an elevator with?
Justin I'm sure.

Did you go ice skating as a kid?
No. I can't even seem to walk without falling down. Ice is not a good idea.

Last person you had an argument with.

Ever have stitches?
I had some staples in my elbow once, but not any stitches.

Favorite non alcoholic drink?
Diet Pepsi with a lime

How long ago did you kiss someone?
About 5 minutes ago. mmm

Ever caught something on fire?
Frequently, but not recently. The most memorable was a wok

Ever seen the northern lights?
No...someday, I hope.

Would you be a surrogate mother, carry a baby for someone else?
Nope. I never, ever want to be pregnant.

Ever been in a fight?
Not for a very long time.

Wearing nail polish?
My toenails are kind of lilac colored but I don't like to paint my fingernails

Innie or outie?
I'm assuming this is referring to my belly button, which is officially classified as an "innie" but is really more of a belly dent.

Ever used a Ouija board?
No. My parents think it's communing with the devil. Strangely it's probably one of the only things my mom and dad agree on. I don't believe in the devil, but if he is real, I doubt Parker Brothers has that sort of connections.

Sweet or sour?
Sour. Pucker Up.

Sun or Moon?
In the past I would have always said the moon. Now, I work at night and I miss the sun. As it turns out I'm really a "mid-afternoon" girl.

What shoes did you wear today?
Black flip flops. It's time to throw them away. They smell like glucose. I don't know why.

Favorite eye color of the opposite sex?

Most important quality in a relationship.
I stole this from Terroni, who stole it from David Sedaris, who I love.

Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings..

So, my answer is discretion.

Nap today?
As soon as The View is over. They are announcing the new moderator today.

Time of day that you were born?
Around 2:15 pm. See I told you I'm an early afternoon girl.

Do you know your blood type?
B- How average.

Name something annoying about public transit?
We don't have any.

Did you grow up in a city or in the country?
Sort of a suburb.

Consider going on a reality show for a large amount of money?
It would have to be a very large amount of money. I'd rather go on a game show.

Flown in your dreams?
No, but I fall off curbs a lot. In my dreams as well as my reality.

Whats the weirdest thing you've ever eaten?
I dunno... I think food in general, particularly kinds of meat and seafood are pretty weird.

Hugs or kisses?
Hugs. Snuggling in particular

What was the best night out of your life? Lurid details please!
This question brings out my pouty face. I don't know why.

Whats your favourite item of clothing?
My black tube top.

What form of dancing are you best (or worse) at?
I'm a really phenomenally bad dancer. Not good at all.

Would you at any time of your life have done playboy for a million?
If they wanted me badly enough to offer me a million dollars then sure I'd do it. But I'm pretty sure they would go out of business.

Gold or silver?
Silver, but I'm trying to ease into some gold without looking all Jersey girl.

If you joined the circus, what would you be?
*frown* The fat lady. Better than the bearded lady I guess. ;)

Do you have a criminal record?
Yes, but hopefully it's going away.

What item of make-up can you not live with out?
I could definitely live make-up free, but would prefer not to go to work without mascara.

Slurpee flavor?
Coconut mmmmhh