Granny

On Saturday my sister got married. The wedding went off without a hitch, except the pastor seemed to forget his lines early on. We weren't sure if she was going to be given away or if her dad would just remain at the front of the church for the duration. I worked the video camera, so unfortunately I do not have a picture to post here. However, lots of the pictures that could have been taken weren't because her grandmother (Granny) insisted on standing in the middle of the aisle to take her own pictures. I'm not at all sure why she thought this was appropriate behavior but had she done this at my wedding (which she thankfully did not attend) I might have stomped down the aisle and sat her down. Or at least had some sort of security on hand.

This is not the first time Granny has caused drama. She is from Germany and has the most overbearing personality (to say it nicely) that I have ever come in contact with. When my dad married D'Liesa's mom, for the first several years I endured visits to see that side of the family a few times a year, I felt consistently judged, she never said anything nice to me, and frequently made nasty comments and implied mean things both behind my back and to my face. It was perfectly clear that she thought I was lower on the evolutionary scale than pond scum. When I got old enough to make my own decisions, I opted out of further trips to experience this sort of torture.

It's not just me either. She makes everyone she meets supremely uncomfortable. She causes more trouble in my family than an out break of anthrax would cause in a subway station. The particles in the air freeze at the mere thought that she might walk through the door. This is one scary little woman.

So, up to Saturday, I had not seen my step-grandparents in 10 years. I can happily say that another 10 years will not be long enough. When I walked into the church and was forced, out of obligation, to say hello to Granny, she looked at me as if I was cockroach crawling across her kitchen counter. When introduced to Justin he shook her hand and she behaved as if she had been burned. You'd think that after 70 plus years on the planet she would have learned to at least hide her contempt. The woman has no social conscience. Justin told me when we got home that he had thought that everyone was exaggerating the extent of her evil, but now, after spending less than 2 minutes with her, he sees it. I think his exact words were something like "She sort of burns your soul." Yup. That pretty much sums it up.